I met a guy on Guardian Soul Mates that sounded interesting and had common interests, especially music taste. He was quick to offer me a ticket to an upcoming gig. Crystal Fighters were playing at Barfly in Camden. However, when I met him, he was much shorter than anticipated, and his photos must have been a decade old, so I decided to cut my loses.

Unfortunately, the bar was so crammed that it was impossible to make a quick exit. So, I decided to give myself a moment to think and headed to the lavatories. As I walked into the cubical, I noticed the window was open. I seized the opportunity, shut the toilet seat, and used the systems as a ladder to climb out the window.

Finally, my Lara Croft ambitions saved me from a potential ‘Womb Raided’ situation later that evening.